It has been far too long. Years have gone by, nations have risen, and fallen, yet there has been one thing missing…. the hero. The avatar, the chosen one. You, the gamer.

It has been far too long since the last challenges were met, bosses defeated, economies developed, players killed. No MMO on the market is even worthy of calling itself an MMO. Fuck you Blizzard. FUCK YOU. god I am so fucking sick of Blizzard. Talk about shattering someones dreams…. then waking that person up with a baseball bat to the head and a nice hot stream of piss to the face. Blizzard took the idea of roleplaying, and turned it into a mindless grindfest cash cow, not your ordinary pop star cash cow…. no no this bitch shoots out gold plated uranium milk. Superman drinks the stuff three times a day, very rich in nutrients… But I digress.. only to say this.

There is hope. Of course we all know Age of Conan is rapidly approaching a release date. It can’t come any sooner. Tentonhammer has a new preview up showcasing the Ranger class.. awesome… This game really looks promising. Leaps and bounds above the current state of things.

Also it appears there have been updates to Darkfall.. Whaaaaat get the fuck out. Vaporware right? Apparently not. Heres a quote from a recent dev. diary

Community: Beta ETA (we all understand possible setbacks that’s nature of the industry but a 1 month 2 yrs or something would be great)

Tasos Flambouras: Previous estimates on beta were honest educated estimates based on facts at the time. Circumstances have a way of changing, so we don’t want to try to estimate again when so many things are in flux. The only thing certain is that we expect everything to come together one way or another within a few months so that our launch can be within the year. When we decide whether to go with a publisher or to self publish we will announce a beta date.

2008 Launch? Lets see it. This game is the closest thing to UO2 we have yet to see. And it might actually be released… I don’t know about you but my nipples are hard.

Lastly, JacktR stumbled upon Savage 2 today. We downloaded the client and jumped in game and I gotta say, its pretty damn fun. The game client is free to download and offers a demo account of 5 hours. After those 5 hours you can purchase an account serial for 29.99, one time fee, no monthly charge. The game play rivals that of any simplistic battleground you will find in World of Warcraft. Like the first Savage, the game play is a blend of First Person Shooters, Real Time Strategies and a bit of RPG element. Think of it like Warcraft 2, only you take the role of one of the units, and fight it out 1st/3rd person. There are squads, and a commander position. Commanders do the building of structures, research and micro management aspects. No Monthly, instant action…. Fuck I hate blizzard….

I saw the movie Sweeney Todd: Demon Barber of Fleet Street, and I highly recommend it. Its amazing. Almost as good as Rambo. Haha so many dead Koreans in one movie, how did they get away with it. Kidding… great movie.

Where do I start? So much to discuss. I am at work right now bored as fuck and figured I’d update the site with a bit of necessary information as I go throughout my day sitting in this god damn cubicle. It’s alright though, no money like easy money. Well I guess it should be safe to start with X-MAS. I fucking hate X-MAS, worst holiday ever. Except for the fact that I somehow came up on a bomb ass iPOD touch, but be careful of the touch, it’s pretty orgasmic.

I don’t even know where to start with this thing. Technology is fucking outta control these days. I feel like futurama with a blunt bigger then my head. This shit right here, this shit called deaf, nigga. “You mean when I hit it I’ll die?”, No nigga the shit called deaf, like you go deaf nigga. lawls. Kat Williams ftw.

Secondly, I would like to make an announcement regarding the ever so loving game that I still play to this day for no apparent reason. For some reason I always feel like I’m trying to re-live the old UO days when I was a youngster but my hope gets shot down everytime I log into hybrid. I miss it like crazy, you have no idea Nothing will ever be the same god dammit, keep comming out with these lame ass leveling games that all have the same thing in common; GAY. Gee A Why. GAY. Why does it seem like people had better ideas back in the day then they do today? Why does it seem like everyone wants to jump on the same bandwagon non-stop and produce the same lame games as before? Why can’t anyone adapt to the real way an MMORPG should be played. I want to kill you, stomp on you, let my horse take a shit on you, and feast on your corpse while you tear your whole house apart IRL. Which leads me to: UOG: Divinity. Now, for those of you who haven’t heard much about it this shard has been around for quiet awhile now. The population never got too great because the shard wasn’t maintained as much as it should be and the staff’s main priority was Hybrid, of course. Now, I am a hybrid player, not much of the pre-t2a but I can throw down it need be. I was still really new to the game when this age of pvp was taking place. Anywho, with that being said the minds of Team RunUO & Team WTFMan.com have joined forces to re-create this amazing feeling. Please take some time to try the shard out and get the community growing. I will be running around from time to time but will not give out my ingame name on Divinty. I’d rather keep it OG :]

In conclusion, Merry X-Mas, Play Divinity, eat shit, & die.
See you on the field :]

P.S. I think it’s time Pudrick suited up and retrieve his char from retirement eh? I think this shard has a lot of fucking potential.

Peace.

It’s 1:33am here, which means the Halo 3 launch is already underway. For most pc gamers this means nothing at all. Why? Because from day one we’ve been given the shaft by MS and their whored out acquisition. Now now I know many of the console fanboys will come forward with.

“but ura, Halo is XBox only”

But in reality, Halo was being designed around the PC platform and more specifically the 3Dfx Voodoo 4/5 series of video cards. This means it was set to either use OpenGL or more likely support Glide directly.

Given ages of waiting and delays the PC audience saw a half ass port of Halo to the PC, poorly written and badly optimized for gaming, the title was claimed to need stronger hardware to run it due to complexity, but in reality it was just a pile of garbage they threw at the audience to calm them down. Come 2007 we see Halo 2 for Vista, why? no one knows, the game was written on basically DX7 hardware with minimal complexities for hardware power. Regardless MS tried to force the PC user base into a new scheme to do Live on the PC. Sadly this was ages late and no one was about to pay for a service that was awful to begin with (not to mention later cracked to run on DX9)

Now though we have Halo 3 on the Xbox 360, a title promising to be the best FPS in the world 100x over. With MS thumbing their nose at anyone who didn’t give them great oral at E3, GDC, TGS or etc, it made it easy to figure out how to stop normal web sources on reporting (hell I even belong to a prominent website and we still didn’t get jack). Well here’s an idea, Halo 3 so far is… a multiple leaked, spoiled title featuring yet another attempt at rehashing story or “lore” to appease the masses so they can “finish the fight” with master chef, a renegade cook who apparently took to fighting an alien invasion. Given that this is the future and you are catering to a group of users being raised on inferior controls it only makes sense to make them seem like they’re somewhat talented and capable, lets make that a change then, you’re a master chef a super cook with the ability to hold a regenerative shield that apparently can never take source energy damage, also despite being a super being with advanced computer controls can’t aim for your life, such result means that auto-aim is of course included, because aliens have hit-boxes and aimbots make life easy for newbies.

Introduce further a lackluster online model ripping methods already established for the sake of originality, furthermore simplify it to make sure everyone can have a good time because it would be awful if there was ever a strong challenge. Support that one by making predictable spawn points and allowing easy access to camp those points with the largest weapons on the map. Furthermore enhance those stronghold positions so that campers retain a dominant role.

Halo 3 is going to be a great title, it’ll shut the kids up who have been ranting about it for ages finally so that real FPS gamers can get on with a myriad of titles that rule it in every way and probably ahead of the release schedule on the Xbox 360 as well. Nothing like UT3 before it even arrives on the closed network 360.

Halo fans will be in for a treat as they prepare for another long strung out series of online matches over andover and over with periodic map updates and no supporting legal mod community.

PC fans will enjoy a barrage of CTF, CP, LMS, TDM, DM, and more on the PC side with a huge variety of online titles and methods of gameplay, best of all even the older communities have thriving servers, oh my, what’s this? Variety? From games that created these modes before Halo? Oh god what will we do. I mean god even ROTT was a better multiplayer title compared to Halo 3.

Thanks MS for saving PC gamers the trouble of having to put up with a hype machine. I’ll gladly return back to the depths of Team Fortress 2, Crysis, Half-Life 2 Episode 2, S.T.A.L.K.E.R., ET:QW, Far Cry 2, MOH, COD4 and other titles. Of course also without the stipulation of paying out monthly for bs matchmaking when I can easily click in on a huge array of servers for fast action and large numbers. There’s something about 4v4 that isn’t very entertaining.

I’d like to thank me, myself and I for this rant. I’d like to tell MS to piss off for treating the media like crap and that regardless of the marketing machine, even with a month to play it, Halo 3 would be shit. The better part of this rant is I know that they wouldn’t devote the time of day here or on my company site to review it, because they’re not going to get a free pass for a 10/10.

Blow me gates, ballmer and your fag pr firm edelmann. I don’t need a title based on a generic story model ripping gameplay from every other title over at least the last 10 years. Originality and a set of balls would do your company some good, unfortunately we’ll continue to see more Halo rehash attempts so they can say they tried their best to fuel the stagnation er development of the game.

I’d like to say this is a pudnation challenge to MS to put up, but I think the community knows what to expect from the company and what this game will ultimately be in terms of quality.

Crazy article from the LA Times.

The blood that stained the courtyard of the modest Thousand Oaks apartment complex had been washed away by Monday morning. In its place stood a makeshift memorial: A teddy bear and a few balloons. A Winnie-the-Pooh baby blanket. And a single rose for every year the young victim had lived.

Sev’n Molina, age 6, was hacked to death with a meat cleaver Sunday night, as his mother fought to save his life, terrified neighbors called 911 and the bravest among them tried to intervene in the grisly struggle.

Sheriff’s deputies arrested Calvin Sharp, 27, and took him to Ventura County Jail, said Senior Sheriff’s Deputy Julie Novak. Sharp, a self-employed cab driver, is expected to be charged with one count of murder and two counts of attempted murder — rare violent crimes in what regularly ranks as one of nation’s safest large cities.

The harrowing attack at the Hillcrest Park Apartments began about 9:30 p.m. in the first-floor unit where the boy lived with his mother, Sandra Ruiz, 33. Sharp and Ruiz had been arguing, at least in part, about whether Sev’n spent too much time playing video games, neighbors said.

After the boy burst from the apartment into the communal courtyard, witnesses said, Sharp followed him, wielding the cleaver, and began hacking at the child’s head and shouting, “Die, die!”

Holy shit. Even I feel it would be in bad taste to report on this in a sarcastic manner. I mean this is pretty fucked up.

Something is wrong with our society. I guess something is wrong with all societies, but I can’t help but notice the increase of random acts of violence occuring within this last decade. Sure since the dawn of man there has been violence in all area’s of established cultures: gangs, diplomatic disagreements, religious wars, husbands killing their cheating whore wives; but this is completely different. It’s like people have gone completely fucking insane, and not that they have really lost their minds, but that they use the idea of insanity to rationalize violent outlashing. Whether its chopping up a 6 year old, pushing someone onto subway tracks, or the countless reports of violence across school campuses; this shit has just gotten out of control. In the words of Maynard James Keenan, “learn to swim”. We really could use a thinning of the herd right about now.

Blame the gays…

I mean we all knew something was wrong with John Travolta, we just did. It was one of those things where you’re like “dude, this can’t be all there is”. Of course though we were all right to believe this.

I’ll go ahead and give everyone a moment to go ahead and puke, find jesus, get a gun, shoot themselves, slash their eyes, burn their skin or whatever else it takes to get this horrid mess out of their minds.

Honestly, why the fuck would someone go, dude that looks awesome, lets crossdress, but not stop there, lets instead crossdress like a fatty, oh wait one more one more. Lets crossdress like a hideous looking I ate your family and their friends giant tubby bitch and on top of that lets get an extra scoop of gay and show some upper leg, because thats what I wanted to wake up to, I wanted to wake up and go, oh shit mm yeah some hot ass leg action from John Travolta.

On top of this there is apparently also an all-star cast behind this movie, even fucking Christopher Walken is in this, while I get that aspect I surely hope he’s not doing the same, I think I’d have to take a 12 gauge and blow the back of my fucking head off if I had to see shaved leg, girly Walken prancing around like a fucking ultra dandy. I mean the man has played some of the most vile roles ever and if he jumps that barrier, there’s nothing left.

This establishes it though folks, there is no god, and if there is, he’s been laid off in favor of a giant ass homo.

Damn your tv, your movies, your fashion, your fucking music, your style, your colors and your apparent control over what used to be good and awesome in this country. Fuck you I hope you all fucking die with C4 dildos wedged in your asses for this horrific excuse for film.

It’s always fucking amazing to see things like this. Pud of course being the man with the illegal plan at E3 this year. How on earth he even got in I don’t know.

Anyway being one of the many at the show this year especially on the Culver City lot, it was cool to see Sony looking like they were going to actually bat one out for the consumers, enter The Register / El Reg with the info from SCEE about the status of the 60GB price reduction. Guess what, the $499 deal wasn’t a kindness act by them it was so they could wipe out existing stock so they can pull yet another 20GB magic show.

For those not following it’s simple.

20GB PS3 @ 499 - Sells like fucking hotcakes out the door, instant boost to overall unit sales

60GB PS3 @ 499 - Sells like fucking hotcakes because everyone waiting for a price cut went for it thinking holy shit the PS3 is going down in price!

The catch to both was that no matter what the idea behind it was, that it was destined to sell out and become yet another cut SKU from their lineup.
Good game Sony, you honestly almost had a lot of people there. While you can get the 60GB right now, don’t hesitate on that one because it wont be around for long. News from the register notes that chances are they have already cut production of the 60GB units and are running out the inventory as this is typed.

Next up! 80GB PS3 @ 599! oh well it’s 20GB of space and Motorstorm, you know that hyped up game that fell flat on it’s face when it hit Japan and then again when it hit the US because of all the bugs that were later fixed in an “update” dude when you have like 17 patches and 1 feature, it’s not a fucking update it’s a fucking patch.

Anyway, thats all. Fucking Sony fucking the fucking consumer again because they love fucking people out of their fucking money.

The internet can suck balls these days, it’s true, it was a huge explosive release of potential in the universe that brought about a lot of cool things. Unfortunately these days everything is done to death, so is scamming. As a result these days we look at our email boxes and find that fucktard morons have decided to produce greeting card spam that executes trojans. Yeah I know this is nothing new, it’s been going on a few weeks but my god are these idiots that stupid?

I mean even if someone cared about what I posted here it wouldn’t go down like that.

1. no one knows who the shit I am and I wouldn’t give any of you bastards my email.

2. even if someone did like what I wrote, they wouldn’t send me 1590581902581 fucking e-cards saying it.

3. if they had any shred of a clue about my reactions to things like that by my posts, they’d know I wouldn’t open an e-card anyway. it’s the equivalent of going “duh i like j00…” and me not opening it is the equivalent of… well me not opening it, if anything it would be “fuck you go bang your sister”

So yeah, if you get flooded with e-cards from various sites and fucking retarded messages with pdf attachments, just go ahead and ignore them or delete them. Honestly unless you’re like a 48yr old soccer mom that has 20 cats and a bunch of antique dishes on your desk, you’d probably be smart enough not to do that anyway.

Thank you very much.  Your mom is still a whore.

The internet is one fucked up arena of events. I mean jesus I come online half awake from sleeping in a coma thanks to my window being open alllll motha fuckin night and then I see that some dude who had actually good tutorial vids on youtube for learning guitar has been charged with DMCA violations because he sampled a song for his example. Thats a good one, maybe they can DMCA everyone that plays at their own homes trying to show how they learned a new track to their friends because thats reproduction to an audience right there. I mean come on now? is this what we’re working with?

I guess so though, these days if you reproduce anything remotely related to existing music you better bet your balls that someone is going to come down on you for it. I mean jesus the Sony / BMG CEO wouldn’t have been able to get a diamond studded Mercedes AMG SL55 with baby seal seats. I mean shit, have we become this owned? I think so and it’s fucking sad.

In other news, I love it when vaporware companies get in a fucking pout. Like Infinium labs and the fucking Phantom. Yeah good one guys, our machine is cleverly named on it’s existence, I’m glad they tried to sue HardOCP back in the day and failed to actually get the article pulled, the fact that they did that brought greater attention on them and their sham act. Now we have a free energy machine running around that will allegedly produce infinite energy. It was going to be on demo, but setbacks aka the fact that it doesn’t fucking work, made it so they couldn’t show it at the place. Although later it was said the lighting was fucking it up. Yeah because we all know how deadly those 35watt bulbs are to the world. I remember just yesterday night I turned on my lamp and my whole network blew up, I had to turn it off to be able to regain stability in this quadrant of the galaxy once again.

And fuck it, thats it. wait. no here’s some hard gay. enjoy it fuckers.

Thats what the song on office space said, and surely a few nights ago I felt it when our team was getting absolutely base raped, I haven’t seen that many soliders hammering away since Paris Hilton got out of jail, I mean jesus, just these huge burly men were completely raping everyone on the team.

Sadly after consulting some SC players, it turns out we probably didn’t construct additional pylons, I went and got checked up after this base raping and it turns out I have aids.

Thanks you fucking MEC whores, you can all rot in fucking hell for that shit, I hope someone chops it off and beats you with it til you die. Or that you get tk’ed by some faggot newbs.

I came across this article last week that had me laughing, at first. That laughter soon turned to screaming rage the more i reflected on it. Some website, Gamasutra, did an interview with some idiot (Rob Pardo) from Blizzards dev team over the Father’s Day weekend. Its cute, its heart-warming, its a perfect fucking example of why WOW is the most obnoxious candy land faggot MMO out there, and exactly why I cannot stand mmo gaming. Heres a snippet from the article:

“Playing games with my daughter is great because it really allows me to see what is fundamentally fun about game mechanics. For example, when she was only 5 years old, she would just jump off buildings over and over and collect lots of different outfits for her character. I generally have more of an “achiever” mentality when I play games, and playing with my daughter really helps give me a more rounded perspective towards games”

Yes you read that right, his five year old daughter gives him insight as to how WoW can be better catered towards gamers… 5 year old gamers. With pink slippers and huggy pull-ups. Gay.